Breaking
up is rotten, it doesn’t matter how it happened, you did it, she did it, it’s
still a b**ch. I’ve been asked to do a break-up article so often that I felt it
was time to do it. This article will teach you how to break up with her but
also how to deal with it (regardless of who dumped who).
How
To Break Up
First of all NEVER
jump into a relationship. As previously discussed in the “how to date multiple
women” article, it’s important to establish things from the very beginning,
meaning that if you don’t want a relationship YOU should tell her.
Even if you do this to
the best of your knowledge, or avoided it because you just wanted to sleep with
her (by telling her anything she wanted to hear) you’ll see that the woman
starts to get emotional involved. Sadly, if that happens it’s impossible to
break up with her without hurting her feelings.
This could be viewed
as the ending of an emotional relationship, meaning it would be impossible
without hurting someone emotionally.
So let’s say that
she’s starting to fall in love with you and you aren’t really feeling it. The
most important thing that you can do is to tell her what you feel. Just tell
her that you don’t want to be serious and that you don’t feel the same way.
It’s going to hurt her regardless how you do it, but at least this way you’re
being honest and she’s going to respect you for that. Often enough you’ll even
see her turning into a f**k buddy, but you’ll also see another one leaving
because she just can’t take the pain.
Another important
thing is that when you say it, she won’t really believe you because you’re not actually
DOING IT. You might tell her that you don’t want a relationship at the moment
but she won’t leave you and soon enough you’ll find yourself in all sorts of
boyfriend situations (come meet my parents, come hang out with my friends etc).
What’s important to
remember here is that you need to DO what you claim to feel. It doesn’t matter
that you don’t want a relationship, if you act like a boyfriend she’s going to
get really upset that “you’re not her boyfriend”. If you don’t act like one,
she won’t have anything to complain about.
When it comes to
breaking up and keeping women for casual sex there’s 2 very important things
that you need to remember. Be absolutely honest and open and make sure you back
up your words with actions.
How
To Deal With It
This can happen to all
of us. It has happened to me and it’s going to happen to men all over the
world. If you had an emotional involvement into a relationship, dealing with a
break-up is always going to be hard. It will be especially hard if you get
dumped but even if you break-up with her (for whatever reason) and you were
emotionally involved, it’s still going to hurt like hell.
This is one of the
moments where you can thank God (or any other deity) that you are a man and not
a woman. Having a logical brain (and not emotional, like women) means that you
can deal with this much faster and easier that any women could ever do.
First thing you need
to realize and keep repeating to yourself is that IT’S GOING TO BE OK. It’s not
the end of the world, she wasn’t the only girl on this planet, you got her, you
can get thousands more, you’ll be fine. As soon as you’ve got that down into
your head, you’re already half way there.
Now, coming back to
why you should be happy that you’re a man is because your brain has the outstanding
capability to think and do whatever you want it to do. This means that in order
to get over a break-up efficiently, you need to concentrate your brain on
anything else but her and the relationship.
You can do this
because you’re a man and here are a few things TO do in order to keep your mind
away from all the pain and suffering.
DO
NOT have rebound sex!
That’s right, contrary
to the popular belief that the best remedy is the rebound girl, I honestly
believe that will do more worse than good and here’s why. Let’s say you manage
to get your mind of her and the relationship, if you go out, meet a new girl
and have sex with her, you’re much more prone to remembering what you had with
the other one etc.
This can have
devastating consequences as being so emotionally damaged; you could actually
start another relationship just out of stupidity. Also, you might get rejected
a lot because you’re already under emotional stress (very bad for your game)
and that’s going to depress you even more.
So, best thing to do
is to give to yourself a FEW weeks or even ONE MONTH if the relationship was
serious. Take time for yourself. Learn to enjoy time by yourself, listen to
your favorite music, do the things you couldn’t do in the relationship and
embrace this change. Soon you’ll realize that it’s no big deal and things will
be fine.
Exercise
is great for your mind
Another great thing
that keeps your mind of things is exercise. Studies have shown that people who
exercise process negative emotions faster and are depressed for far shorter
spans of time. So, going to the gym and working out will not only take your
mind of her but it will also help speed things up.
This happens because
exercise will speed up your metabolism which also speeds up emotional recovery.
Plus, working out releases endorphins into your brain which makes you feel good
making it an even better remedy for break-ups.
Work
– A LOT!
This may sound bad but
believe me it isn’t. As previously mentioned, men’s brains have the capability
to ban certain thoughts at will. This also makes us crap at multitasking but
that’s a different problem.
If you focus your mind
ON work, work is the only thing you think about. If you only think about work,
you won’t think about her anymore. This is not a long term solution but its
fantastic way to get over those first few weeks. You’re basically channeling
those negative emotions into something productive.
It doesn’t have to be
work, it can also be your hobbies or whatever else keeps your mind occupied. I
personally have a tendency to work incredibly long hours when I’m depressed and
as shocking as this may seem I come up with fantastic results that make me feel
a lot better about myself and life in general.
If you’ve been dumped
this is the best thing you can do. Turn all those negative feelings into
MOTIVATION. Say something like “I’m going to make so much money/look so great
that will make her soo jealous” – this will eventually start as doing it for
her but will soon turn into you realizing what you’ve accomplished and taking
advantage of it and improving your life (not to mention, FORGETTING about that
chick that didn’t know how to appreciate you).
Turn your pain and
suffering into your own success.
Camp
at your friends
Another great break-up
remedy is your friends. Hanging out with your friends will immediately make you
feel better and forget about her as long as you are with them. When you’re in a
relationship you don’t get AS much time with your friends, so breaking up is a fantastic
way to get back to that.
When I say be with
your friends, I’m not referring to going out in clubs and hooking up with
women, go to their house, relax, laugh, play video games, watch sports, do
sports, drink beer and generally have a good time. You will find that your
friends are the best remedy and fastest way to ease that pain.
Related Articles:
https://blog.loveawake.com/2020/09/21/how-to-stop-caring-what-others-think-of-you/
