среда, 19 февраля 2020 г.

Just because you've forgotten Craiglist doesn’t mean they’ve forgotten you!


I have to hold my hands up, there is no progress with casual fling. Nothing has changed and I must have been fooling myself when I thought he was still ‘thinking about’ what had been said. I just don’t think he knows what he wants and I certainly want more than that!


I’m half chatting to a few guys on the dating site again but not with much gusto. There is soon more drama when I start 
Craiglist chatting to a local guy on Craiglist instant messenger after exchanging a few e-mails. He asks for my number and suggests meeting up at one our local drinking holes to see if we recognise each other as he seems to socialise in all the same places I do. Pretty late that night he text me about arrangements but I was too tired to think straight and reply and ended up falling asleep soon after. I could not believe what I woke to on my phone in the morning!!! He had text me a photo of a girl holding her top up…no bra. I’m flummoxed. The next text says; ‘My ex, what do you think?. I text him back saying not to bother contacting me, I thought it was pretty disrespectful to me and her sending that message considering I doubt her permission was sought and we hadn’t even met yet. I mean, well done mate! No idea why you’re single…Idiot!

I’m recounting this story to my mate Alex at work the next day, he’s been on the dating site too but we hadn’t spoken much about it and he coyly admitted he’d met someone last week. He said her 
Craiglist profile picture was great, she looked really pretty and sounded really sweet. She talked about yoga and fitness on her Craiglist profile, said she liked to look after herself and she was looking forward to meeting someone ‘normal’. When they actually met Alex realised she’d pulled a classic trick; only adding photo’s from the waist up. He walked into some pub to meet her and she was already there sat down. After an hour and two drinks she got up to go to the Craiglist ladies revealing the most eeeenormous hips and ass that were totally out of proportion with the rest of her body. Now that’s just not playing fair and if I met a guy who had edited out his beer belly then I’d be pretty peeved. Now it gets worse, despite Alex being shocked and not entirely pleased with the size of said lady’s derriere he says he’ll meet her again to see how things go. She texts the day before asking him to bring his cheque book as she’s lost hers and really needs to pay for something. Right. Normal? Maybe in your world luv!

It’s a minefield out there and it appears my little friend with the bad judgement on the appropriateness of texts has not got the 
Craiglist message. He texts me again, this time with a picture of his erect penis and a ‘Sorry, will this make it better?’ message below. NO IT WILL NOT! I tell him firmly where to stick it and tell him not to contact me ever again or I’ll report him to the police. I do get a nice reminder that there are sweet people in this world when David texts saying sorry he’s been so busy but he’s been following my favourite TV programme and hopes I’m enjoying it too. But I get a shock on Valentines day….

As a single person it’s really a day to be ignored and I had done just that, I hadn’t even thought about it when I woke up. I got to work and thought nothing of it when the DHL man rang the buzzer, he delivers stuff all the time. The box was for me however, and it was a BIG box. In it were a number of carefully wrapped items and a very pretty card which left no traditional mystery as it was signed ‘Be my valentine, All my love, David, x’. Okaaay. In the box were a number of very carefully chosen items personal to myself; my favourite champagne, my favourite chocolates, the cereal I have always eaten before I go to bed, my favourite board game that I don’t have my own copy of, a punnet of my favourite fruit and a single red rose. I’m quite speechless and halfway between exceptionally impressed and freaked out as his listening skills. In fact, I’m incredulous. I havn’t even told him where I work but I must have mentioned my company name in conversation. The guy is either a genius or had a Dictaphone under the table at all our 
Craiglist dates. I text him with profuse thanks and feel terribly guilty I didn’t even send a card.

I spend the rest of the day still reeling about this mornings package, half chuckling and half freaked out! The buzzer soon wakes me up at four o’clock though, it’s an enormous bunch of flowers. Very rare ones, that only grow in certain places in the far east that are hugely expensive to get over here. Only someone who had listened un-naturally carefully would have found the exact flowers or remembered that I had seen them growing in their natural habitat while travelling. The card just says ‘Have dinner with me next week, David x’.

So what do I make of this one??

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