How To Talk To Your Children About Divorce

Knowing how to talk to your children about divorce is imperative. If you're going through the big "D" and unsure how to approach your children, collect yourself and take some time to think it over. Sometimes it's not what you say, but how you say it.

1. Pick the right time. Before school, important events or late nights are not good times to talk to your children about divorce. Choose the right time-when everyone is fresh, receptive and ready. Another typical place families talk about unpleasant matters is the dinner table. Do your children a favor and only talk about the divorce outside of routine family events.
2. Age appropriate. When talking to your children about divorce, remember about child development. What you say to a toddler versus an elementary school child versus a teenager varies wildly. Remember to be age appropriate. Also, only disclose what the child needs to know. Never down talk the other parent.
3. Enlist your partner's help. Your partner can help you talk to your children about divorce. She may be out the door and on her way to being your ex, but she's the mother of your children. Can you work with her to get on the same page?
4. Enlist the help of a professional. It may be that talking to your children about divorce is too much for you to handle. Or you and the children's mother may be at odds. If the process is overwhelming or the children are in too much pain, enlist the help of a professional. Your attorney can make suggestions if you're unsure which therapist is the best.